Killing Osama bin Laden will only create a martyr. Holding him prisoner
will only inspire his comrades to take hostages to demand his release.
Therefore, we should do neither.
Let the Special Forces, Seals, Green Berets, etc., covertly capture him,
fly him to an undisclosed hospital and have surgeons quickly perform a
complete sex change operation. Then return "her" to Afghanistan to live
as a woman under the Taliban.
> > > > >
********************** < < < < <
Bin Laden's great wall:
Three guys, a Canadian, Osama Bin Laden and Uncle Sam are out walking
together one day. They come across a lamp and a Genie pops out of it.
"I will give each of you each one wish, that's three wishes total," says
the Genie.
The Canadian says, "I am a farmer, my dad was a
farmer, and my son will also
farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in Canada." With a blink of
the Genie's eye, 'POOF' the land in Canada was forever made fertile for
farming.
Osama Bin Laden was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall
around Afghanistan, so that no infidels, Jews or Americans can come into
our precious state." Again, with a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF'
there was a huge wall around Afghanistan.
"Uncle Sam" (A former civil
engineer), asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this
wall." The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 15,000 feet high, 500 feet
thick and completely surrounds the country; nothing can get in or
out---virtually impenetrable."
"Uncle Sam" says, "Fill it with water."
>>>>>************************<<<<<
Bin Laden's
Afterlife Surprise
After getting nailed by a Daisy Cutter, Osama made his way to the pearly
gates. There, he is greeted by George Washington.
"How dare you attack the nation I helped conceive!" yells Mr.
Washington, slapping Osama in the face. Patrick Henry comes up from
behind: "You wanted to end the Americans' liberty, so they gave you
death!" Henry punches Osama on the nose. James Madison comes up next,
and says, "This is why I allowed the Federal government to provide for
the
common defense!" He drops a large weight on Osama's knee.
Osama is subject to similar beatings from John Randolph of Roanoke,
James Monroe and 65 other 18th-century American revolutionaries. As he
writhes on the ground, Thomas Jefferson picks him up to hurl him back
toward the gate where he is to be judged.
As Osama awaits his journey to his final very hot destination, he
screams, "This is not what I was promised!"
An angel replies: "I told you there would be 72 Virginians waiting for
you. What did you think I said?"
>>>>>>>
********************<<<<<<<
Osama's Death
One day in the
future, Osama bin Laden has a heart attack and dies.
He
immediately goes to hell,
where
the devil is waiting for him. "I don't know what to do here," says the
devil. "You are on my list, but I have no room for you. You definitely
have to stay here, so I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I've got a
couple of folks here who weren't quite as bad as you. I'll let one of
them go, but you have to take their place.
I'll even let YOU decide who leaves." Osama thought that sounded pretty
good, so he agreed. The devil opened the first room; in it was Richard
Nixon and a large pool of water. He kept diving in and surfacing empty
handed -- over and over and over. Such was his fate in hell. "No," bin
Laden said. "I don't think so. I'm not a good swimmer and I don't think
I could do that all day long." The devil led him to the next room; in it
was Tony Blair with a sledgehammer and a room full of rocks. All he did
was swing that hammer, time after time after time. "No, I've got this
problem with my shoulder.
I would be in constant agony if all I could do was break rocks all day,"
commented Osama bin Laden.
The devil opened a
third door. In it, Osama saw Bill Clinton, lying on the floor with his
arms staked over his head, and his legs staked in a spread eagle pose.
Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does best. Osama bin
Laden looked at this in disbelief for a while and finally said, "Yeah, I
can handle this." The devil smiled and aid, "OK, Monica, you're free to
go."
Osama Bin Laden Jokes 
farmer, and my son will also
farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in Canada." With a blink of
the Genie's eye, 'POOF' the land in Canada was forever made fertile for
farming. 
"Uncle Sam" (A former civil
engineer), asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this
wall." The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 15,000 feet high, 500 feet
thick and completely surrounds the country; nothing can get in or
out---virtually impenetrable." 
common defense!" He drops a large weight on Osama's knee.
He
immediately goes to hell,
where
the devil is waiting for him. "I don't know what to do here," says the
devil. "You are on my list, but I have no room for you. You definitely
have to stay here, so I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I've got a
couple of folks here who weren't quite as bad as you. I'll let one of
them go, but you have to take their place. 
I would be in constant agony if all I could do was break rocks all day,"
commented Osama bin Laden.
The devil opened a 
